Archeology Prize & Nightmares After Share
by Freya-Kendra
Summary: 2 Filks/Song Parodies: 1. Archeology Prize was American Pie by Don McLean Episode focus: The Curse Season 4 ; 2. My Nightmares After Share was Hotel California by The Eagles .
1. Archeology Prize

**Title:** **Archeology Prize  
Notes:** Originally "American Pie" - Don  
**Episode:** The Curse, Season 4

**Archeology Prize**

A long, long time ago,

I can still remember

how his lectures used to make me dream.

And I knew if I had my chance,

That I could make my theories dance,

And maybe earn a touch of his esteem.

But then I saw that drug-store rag,

A deadly curse; a cheap sales tag.

Bad news in the headline;

One honest truth made the deadline.

I can't remember if I cried

When I knew I'd never earn his pride;

But something touched me deep inside,

The day my mentor died.

**Chorus:**

And bye, bye, archeology prize.

Gave my theories to the juries and they said I was high.

Them good ol' boys will never give up their lies;

They're sayin' Dr. Jackson's dead in our eyes.

Dr. Jackson's dead in our eyes.

* * *

Did I write a book of lies,

in my old professor's eyes?

At least Steve Rayner tells me so.

Now, that I believed in something new,

While they all said it wasn't true,

Makes me yearn to tell them what I know.

Well, I never cleared my tarnished name,

Or justified my wild claims.

They still scoff at my views;

Man I hate this secretive ruse!

I'm just some crazy nut like old grand-dad.

I lost the life I might have had.

But all that really makes me sad

Is to know my mentor died.

**Chorus:**

And bye, bye, archeology prize.

Gave my theories to the juries and they said I was high.

Them good ol' boys will never give up their lies;

They're sayin' Dr. Jackson's dead in our eyes.

Dr. Jackson's dead in our eyes.

* * *

Now for 5 years, I've been on my own,

My whereabouts a complete unknown.

Wish that's not how it had to be.

While Apophis made my wife his queen,

My old friends stayed in their worn out scene,

Without a clue about our real history.

Oh, then Sarah made a careless glance,

And old Osiris took his chance.

Oh, and while my mentor burned,

An old Goa'uld was returned.

Oh, as Steven's book bought him a Porsche,

Sarah's life was turned off course,

And I fought back a Goa'uld force,

The day, my mentor died.

**Chorus:**

And bye, bye, archeology prize.

Gave my theories to the juries and they said I was high.

Them good ol' boys will never give up their lies;

They're sayin' Dr. Jackson's dead in our eyes.

Dr. Jackson's dead in our eyes.

* * *

Egypt's old glyphs together with Goa'uld script

When Steve flew off to an old desert crypt

Osiris never even made a sound….

He landed flat on the ground,

And when he finally came around

He said he recognized what he had found.

He said he knew that I was right,

But those words could never last the night,

Oh, we had to find a lie

So he'd once again deny

I had insight in the field.

My vindication had to yield,

The SGC couldn't be revealed

After my mentor died.

**Chorus:**

And bye, bye, archeology prize.

Gave my theories to the juries and they said I was high.

Them good ol' boys will never give up their lies;

They're sayin' Dr. Jackson's dead in our eyes.

Dr. Jackson's dead in our eyes.

* * *

And while we were all in one place

Osiris made a break for space

With threats to come and fight us here again.

Jack was fishing; Jack was gone;

When Jack came back he saw it all went wrong,

And to the Goa'uld I'd lost another friend.

And as I read about the curse,

Then I knew my life was worse.

All Goa'ulds are born in hell,

And I'm caught in their spell.

Their ships soar high into the night

To light the sacrificial right,

And Osiris is laughing with delight,

Because my mentor died.

**Chorus:**

And bye, bye, archeology prize.

Gave my theories to the juries and they said I was high.

Them good ol' boys will never give up their lies;

They're sayin' Dr. Jackson's dead in our eyes.

Dr. Jackson's dead in our eyes.

* * *

When I went back to the SGC,

My friends all tried to comfort me,

But I just smiled and turned away.

Then I went down to the 28th floor,

Where I'd gone so many times before,

But the Stargate seemed so empty there that day.

Through the halls alarms can blare,

And calls of warning fill the air,

But all was hushed and silent,

Everywhere that I went.

My life will never be the same

After this bloody Goa'uld game,

I hope someone will respect my name

Although my mentor died.

And I was singin'

**Chorus:**

Bye, bye, archeology prize.

Gave my theories to the juries and they said I was high.

Them good ol' boys will never give up their lies;

They're sayin' Dr. Jackson's dead in our eyes.

Dr. Jackson's dead in our eyes.

Bye, bye, archeology prize.

Gave my theories to the juries and they said I was high.

Them good ol' boys will never give up their lies;

They're sayin' Dr. Jackson's dead in our eyes.


	2. My Nightmares After Share

**Title:** **My Nightmares After Sha're****  
Notes:** originally "Hotel California", by the Eagles (as sung by Daniel)

**My Nightmares After Sha're**

On a bright desert planet,

hot wind in my hair,

Goa'uld pyramid spaceship,

rising up in the air,

I saw a hand raised before me,

And then a shimmering light.

My head grew heavy and my sight grew dim.

I couldn't put up a fight.

There she stood in the doorway;

familiar flash in her eyes.

And I was thinking to myself,

I must be dreaming, we've said our good-bye's.

Then she looked in my memories,

And she showed me a dream.

There were voices down the corridor,

I thought I heard them scream.

_Chorus:_

Welcome to my nightmares after Sha're.

Such a lonely place;

Such a haunting face.

There's plenty of pain in my nightmares after Sha're.

Any time I sleep,

The memories will creep.

* * *

My mind Machello has twisted;

I've had sarcophagus mends.

At least I can be thankful for

My teammates and friends.

Always there when I need them;

I hope they never regret,

Helping me to remember;

helping me to forget.

* * *

When I looked for the colonel,

he was drinking my wine.

He said, "I haven't seen peace or love since 1969."

And still those voices keep screaming from far away;

Come to me in the middle of the night,

Just to hear me say….

_Chorus_:

Welcome to my nightmares after Sha're.

Such a lonely place;

Such a haunting face.

There's plenty of pain in my nightmares after Sha're.

Any time I sleep,

The memories will creep.

* * *

Gold glyphs on the ceiling,

Describe a sacrifice.

Then she said, "You are at the mercy of me,

And my ribbon device."

In Apophis' chambers,

they gathered for the fight.

They shot us with their staff weapons;

and tried to show us their might.

Last thing I remember,

I was running for the door.

I had to find the passage back

to the place I was before.

"Relax," said Lotan,

"I am programmed to explain.

You can visit any time you want,

but this is not your domain."

_Chorus:_

Welcome to my nightmares after Sha're.

Such a lonely place;

Such a haunting face.

There's plenty of pain in my nightmares after Sha're.

Any time I sleep,

The memories will creep.


End file.
